Limericks of three varieties: Clean, Suggestive, and Filthy! The ones in red
are R- to X-rated. Those with numeric-only labels are my own, those labeled "OP" are from Other Posters, and the ones with "PD" labels are in the Public Domain. You may email me at limericist@cox.net.
Sunday, November 29, 2015
1910. When I say 'screw,' I mean it
There was an odd fellow named Phil Who could give all the girls a real thrill For he had a peenie Shaped like a Bernini Curled column. It felt like a drill!
Picture is from inside St. Peter's Basilica, Click for more detail, then hit Esc to return here.
You've just caused a storm, now you did it! All the girls will line up, just admit it! And when each takes her turn Then her only concern Is to see how you drill it and fit it.
Then when YOU reach the big Pearly Gate Old St. Peter will be quite irate For comparing a solemn Bernini-curled column To your anatomical trait.
That's very kind of you, Phil, but you might want to read it first before making such a generous offer because: a) you may see it as just one of those 'silly and straightforward' limericks that I come up with b) the content may not be politically correct to some readers
You've just caused a storm, now you did it!
ReplyDeleteAll the girls will line up, just admit it!
And when each takes her turn
Then her only concern
Is to see how you drill it and fit it.
Then when YOU reach the big Pearly Gate
Old St. Peter will be quite irate
For comparing a solemn
Bernini-curled column
To your anatomical trait.
S.H.
Excellent 2nd stanza! However, L1 of stanza 1 would rhyme better if written:
ReplyDeleteYou've started a fire, yes, you lit it!
Yes, you're right! It's perfect; that new first line would fit splendidly. I love it! (and remember, fire and the devil go hand in hand, you devil!)
ReplyDeleteS.H.
You've got the right saint there, Phil. Like the limerick too.
ReplyDeleteAlso, that's an awesome 10-liner, Suzanne.
By the way, Phil, if you hadn't found out by now, Suzanne won the latest contest over at Mad's.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the heads up, Dave. When I decided to stop writing there I also quit reading there.
ReplyDeleteI'll have to go see what won it for ya, Suz! May I publish it as an "OP" entry but giving you full attribution?
That's very kind of you, Phil, but you might want to read it first before making such a generous offer because:
ReplyDeletea) you may see it as just one of those 'silly and straightforward' limericks that I come up with
b) the content may not be politically correct to some readers
So, I would understand if you hesitated.
S.H.
Anyone offended by that is trying to be and is not someone I want to know. Their time is better spent removing the stick from their anus.
DeleteZero hesitation here, it's very cute and just got posted as OP229.
ReplyDeletea) what's wrong with 'silly and straightforward?' I try for that all the time
b) PC? On MY blog? You've gotta be kidding!
Thank you.
DeleteS.H.
If he allowed my monkey verse, he wasn't going to refuse your contest winner.
Delete