Friday, December 9, 2016

2323. Wait for it...

A woman with beautiful hooters
Counts all men in town as her rooters
By refusing a ring
She makes every guy sing

Yes, she's expert at beating off suitors.


  1. What a coinkydink! A few days ago, I wrote a limerick similar to yours above that also included the words 'hooters' and 'suitors' but it has 3 verses. It's part of Mad's limerick contest, using the word 'ice.' (As an experiment, this week we are allowed to use the word of the week in lines 3 and 4 instead of 1, 2 and 5. We may do it one way or the other, it's optional) My limerick is actually a reply to Ken Gosse's limerick (he's a fellow contestant), which is actually a reply to a limerick I wrote prior to that. So if I write my 'hooters-suitors' verse, it will only make sense if I start the story at the beginning, so here goes nothing...

    I said:

    The guests arrived! Dread has me filled
    For the wine I will serve is not chilled
    Someone gave me advice
    To just add some crushed ice
    That should make it quite nice; now I'm thrilled!

    Oh, but now I'm concerned it's diluted
    The idea is so convoluted
    Well, it now matters none
    That's because everyone
    Drank a lot, had some fun, got polluted!

    Then Ken Gosse wrote:

    Grapes Without Wrath -
    [thanks to Suzanne's post above]

    Fine wine is all right when you dine,
    But when partyin' long after 9,
    Buy a box and some straws,
    Even barrels with flaws,
    Or just let your guests chew on a vine.

    Then I replied, saying:

    Please invite me out to your next party
    Your strange ways to imbibe seem quite hearty
    Drinking cold is real nice
    So have plenty of ice
    Even snow would suffice, you ole smarty!

    If you want things to really get stranger
    Drinking games are a big rearranger
    Serve up nice Jell-O shooters
    By hooters on scooters
    But if they have suitors, there's danger!

    Now if things get too wild and insane
    It's a strain and a pain to contain
    Even ice cannot fizzle
    The fire that may sizzle
    Well, how 'bout a drizzle of rain?

  2. Now I recall why I dropped out of Mad's constests. Too much better competition!

  3. Poppycock! Nonsense! Though I appreciate what you're saying, I don't agree with it. You're just as good, if not better. You sell yourself short, and it's a sad pity.