PD312-315. Clean classics

There was a young lady of Kent,
Who admitted she knew what it meant
        When men asked her to dine,
        And plied her with wine,
She knew, oh she knew -- but she went!

There once was a man with a hernia
Who said to his doctor, "Gol dern ya,
        When you work on my middle
        Be sure you don't fiddle
With things down there that don't concern ya."

There once was a pretty young Mrs.
Whose tearful but short story thrs.
        Her mind lost its grasp -
        Now she thinks she's an asp
And just sits in the corner and hrs.

According to experts, the oyster
In its shell - a crustacean cloister -
       May frequently be
       Either he or a she
Or both, if it should be its choice ter.
Cute, but wrong.  They are in phylum Mollusca.