I've been a penpal of Connecticut's Steve Benko for over a year. Steve gets at least one of his limericks published almost every week in the AWADmail.
With his approval, I am posting all those he submitted to AWAD this week, when the theme was "Words with unusual plurals." I think you readers will agree that, across the board, they are top-notch!
Bema (BEE-muh - plural bemata) - a raised platform for speaking in a place of worship
Under gathering clouds on the bema,
Spoke Noah: "It's our Hiroshima.
You sinners are toast,
But on top I will coast,
For the Lord is my personal FEMA."
Quale (KWA lee - plural qualia) - a property as perceived by a person subjectively
The suburban life had a smooth quale
For Ward and June Cleaver and Wally
But Beaver and Lumpy
At times found it bumpy
For Eddie was quite the svengali
Starets (STAHR its - plural startsy) - a religious teacher or advisor
From St. Peter I've fallen so far it's
A wonder I still have a starets
It's now Tel Aviv
In whose God I believe
And the paper I read is Ha'aretz
Genus (plural genera) - a biological classification group covering one or more species
A word that rhymes nicely with "genus"
Was whispered from heaven by Venus
"It fits like a glove,"
Sighed the Goddess of Love,
"But from Eros the Christians would wean us"
Paries (PAR-eez - plural parietes) - the wall of a body part or cavity
Whether Gemini, Virgo, or Aries
You're fated to sing like canaries
If hiding some loot
From the mob, or they'll shoot
A big hole in your abdomen's paries
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