Limericks of three varieties: Clean, Suggestive, and Filthy! The ones in red
are R- to X-rated. Those with numeric-only labels are my own, those labeled "OP" are from Other Posters, and the ones with "PD" labels are in the Public Domain. You may email me at limericist@cox.net.
Tuesday, September 20, 2016
2241. An undeserved plug
A man up in cold Saskatoon Did more than drink in a saloon He'd fill up his jaw With a large Red Man™ chaw And expectorate in a spittoon.
You didn't know? Don't you two ever communicate? His life so far has been unlike others his age. Besides, this one can be labelled 'Volume I'. Volume II will come out when he's in his 50's or 60's, probably before you kick the bucket, so that you can enjoy your friend's story. I'm sure there will be plenty of mention of limericks, T & A, and an Oklahoman who inspired and mentored him, etc.
Oh, I almost forgot; the first one of you two who shows me the first draft gets $10K from me... a little incentive to get the ball rolling. I don't want to wait forever for these bestsellers to come out!
My biography would be the most boring thing you've ever read in your life.
I've kicked around the thought of writing a book of limericks before, but at this point, I don't have anywhere near enough. If I had your volume of verses, Phil, I would give it a shot. Maybe you should write a book...
And as much as I want that $10K, I'm neither close to ready to submit a draft nor convinced that money actually exists (like a Donald Trump charity donation).
Aww, lighten up, Poopsie! Your book would make a great movie. Maybe you SHOULD start drinking, or chewing that stuff. It might wake you up to how interesting your life really is...
Title: "The sermon prior to the mount (in re [INRI?]: Matthew 6:25)"
Dave's no hoser -- eschews chew tobacky. Here's his knack: Likes to snack in the sack. He . Will bed down some pretty . To nibble her titty Then lap up her moisture, by cracky!
Pardon my reference to the old joke, "Confucius say: 'Bleach blonde have black hair, by cracky.'"
Very artistic, funny, punny, well-written. You're not the prude that I thought you were, unless I overlooked a past, promiscuously-written verse of yours. It seems you can be as delightfully nutty as your brother!
Aha! I see that you've stolen a snippet of David's biography! I'm impatiently awaiting the release of his book as well as yours.
ReplyDeleteHe has a book in process??!! An autobiography?!
ReplyDeleteIsn't 34 a bit young for writing one's memoirs?
You didn't know? Don't you two ever communicate? His life so far has been unlike others his age. Besides, this one can be labelled 'Volume I'. Volume II will come out when he's in his 50's or 60's, probably before you kick the bucket, so that you can enjoy your friend's story. I'm sure there will be plenty of mention of limericks, T & A, and an Oklahoman who inspired and mentored him, etc.
ReplyDeleteOh, I almost forgot; the first one of you two who shows me the first draft gets $10K from me... a little incentive to get the ball rolling. I don't want to wait forever for these bestsellers to come out!
DeleteMy biography would be the most boring thing you've ever read in your life.
ReplyDeleteI've kicked around the thought of writing a book of limericks before, but at this point, I don't have anywhere near enough. If I had your volume of verses, Phil, I would give it a shot. Maybe you should write a book...
And as much as I want that $10K, I'm neither close to ready to submit a draft nor convinced that money actually exists (like a Donald Trump charity donation).
Also, I don't drink, and I don't chew that stuff.
ReplyDeleteAww, lighten up, Poopsie! Your book would make a great movie. Maybe you SHOULD start drinking, or chewing that stuff. It might wake you up to how interesting your life really is...
ReplyDeleteTitle: "The sermon prior to the mount (in re [INRI?]: Matthew 6:25)"
ReplyDeleteDave's no hoser -- eschews chew tobacky.
Here's his knack: Likes to snack in the sack. He
. Will bed down some pretty
. To nibble her titty
Then lap up her moisture, by cracky!
Pardon my reference to the old joke, "Confucius say: 'Bleach blonde have black hair, by cracky.'"
Very artistic, funny, punny, well-written. You're not the prude that I thought you were, unless I overlooked a past, promiscuously-written verse of yours. It seems you can be as delightfully nutty as your brother!
ReplyDelete