PD59-61. All clean, all clever

There once was a curate from Kew,
Who kept a black cat in a pew.
He taught it to speak
Alphabetical Greek,
But it never got farther than mu.

There's a wonderful family, Stein.
There's Gertrude, there's Ep, and there's Ein.
Gert's poetry's bunk,
Ep's statues are junk,
And no one can understand Ein.

In the English Post Office the abbreviation for Salisbury is "Sarum"
and that of Hampshire is "Hants."  Say the short versions...
There was a young curate of Salisbury
Whose manners were too halisbury-scalisbury.
He walked about Hampshire
Without any pampshire
'Til the vicar compelled him to walisbury.

You may be wondering how Hampshire could become 'Hants' when it has no 'n.'  Well, Hampshire itself is an abbreviation..... for Hamptonshire.