Monday, November 26, 2012

880. "Gentlemen, choke your chickens..."

A fraternity cook, slightly perved,
Had a contest for which guy deserved
To get fed first for dinner.
Said, "Circle-jerk winner!"
A pure case of first come, first served.

2 comments:

  1. A trend in language that annoys me is the vacuous "verbing" of nouns, e.g., "This is where I office," "Where shall we church this Christmas?"

    But if The Limericist will descend into this practice, a better first line may result. Taking the diminutive of the noun "pervert" and verbing it produces the neoverb "to perve." While your cook may well have been "not unnerved" why not alter the line to:

    A fraternity cook, wholly perved,

    (or insert another adverb of your choice, e.g., likely, slightly, truly)?

    Furthermore, not unlike the limericized "Baker of Nottingham," the cook might want to give those young men some finger-shaped sponge cakes before they start their contest so they can restock the Twinkie supply.

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  2. Excellent suggestion, Okie. I like it better than my "A fraternity cook was unnerved" and the emendation has been made.

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