PD368-380. Even more worldly pleasures

Mohammed, when lodged in Medina
Imported a fifth wife from China
Being anxious to know
If it really were so
That Chinese have a squinted vagina.

Exuberant Sue from Anjou
Found that fucking affected her hue;
She presented to sight
Some parts pink, some parts white,
And others quite purple and blue.

There was a young man from Seattle
Whose testicles tended to rattle.
He said as he fuck-ed
Some stones in a bucket,
"If Stravinsky won't deafen you -- that'll."

There was a young sailor from Brighton,
Who said to his girl, "You're a tight one."
She replied, "Bless my soul,
You're in the wrong hole;
There's plenty of room in the right one."

There was a poor parson from Goring,
Who made a small hole in his flooring,
Fur-lined it all 'round,
Then laid on the ground,
And declared it was cheaper than whoring.

There once was a woman from Reno
Who used to enjoy playing Keno
'Til she laid on her back
Began ope'ning her crack
Now she owns the whole fucking casino

There was a young man of Natal
Who was fucking a Hottentot gal.
Said she, "You're a sluggard!" 
Said he, "You be buggered! 
I like to fuck slow, and I shall." 

There was a young monk in Siberia,
Whose morals were very inferior,
He jumped on a nun
Which he shouldn't have done,
And now she's a Mother Superior.

There once was a lady from Cager
Who, as the result of a wager,
Consented to fart 
The whole oboe part 
Of Mozart's quartet in F-Major. 

There was a young squaw of Wohunt
Who possessed a collapsible cunt.
It had many odd uses,
Produced no papooses,
And fitted both giant and runt.

There was a young lady of Bicester
Who was nicer by far than her sister:
The sister would giggle
And wiggle and jiggle,
But this one would come if you kissed her.

There was a young lady from Worcester
Who complained that too many men gorcester.
So she traded her scanties
For sandpaper panties,
Now they goose her much less than they used 'ter.

I met a lewd nude in Bermuda,
Who thought she was shrewd; I was shrewder;
She thought it quite crude
To be wooed in the nude;
I pursued her, subdued her, and screwed her.