Saturday, May 17, 2014

PD139-144. Various vulgarities

A neurotic young man from Tulane
Caused his mother considerable pain
He poured nitroglycerin
Where dad put his pisser in
And then threw her under a train.

A certain young lady named Rowell
Had a musical bent to her bowel.
With a good plate of beans
Tucked under her jeans
She'd play To a Wild Rose by MacDowell.

There is a hot lady named Broom,
Who reminds me of someone---but whom?
If only I knew
I'd get both the two
Together some night, and I'd' screw'm.

In all of the Grecian metropolis
There was only one virgin---Papapoulos;
But her cunt was all calluses
From fucking the phalluses
Of gods that adorned the Acropolis

A young airline stewardess, May,
Has achieved the ultimate lay.
She was screwed without quittin’
From Maine to Great Britain
It's clear that she’s come a long way.

(My guess is the plane left from Bangor.)

There once was a harlot named Leeza
Who said, "If my cunt doesn't please ya,
You are welcome to cum
In my slimy old bum,
Just be careful the tapeworm don't seize ya".


  1. The one about the tart with the tapeworm is a favorite of mine (Gershon Legman's "The Limerick," number 1057, page 216), but the first line could use a Taenia-weeny tweak. "There once was a whore from Silesia..." makes an exact rhyme.

    1. By all means, make the emendation. I grabbed it from another website rather than from Legman so that I could cut and paste.

      Only you would know the version posted had verisimilitude. This pleases me greatly. Otherwise, I'd never have been prompted to google 'taenia.' What the helminthes will you come up with next?