I'll be offline until April 7 so enjoy these on a one-a-day basis
There was a young girl named McKnight
Who got drunk with her boyfriend one night
She came to in bed
With a split maidenhead --
That's the last time she ever was tight.
There was a young lady of Asia
Who had an odd kind of aphasia
She'd forget that her cunt
Was located in front
Which deprived her of most of the pleasure.
A certain young man of great gumption
'Mongst cannibals had the presumption
To go - but, alack!
He never came back.
They say 'twas a case of consumption.
There was a young harlot of Clyde
Whose doctor cut open her hide
He misplaced her stitches
And closed all her niches
She now does her work on the side.
A decrepit old gas man named Peter
Whilst hunting around for the meter
Touched a leak with his light;
He arose out of sight
And, as anyone can see by reading this, it also destroyed the meter.
Your last offering about the decrepit old gas man appeared in my high school literature anthology's limerick section with other weak sisters and some bowdlerized dirty ones. I figured "Gas Man" was one of the latter or just stupid, and of course the instructor didn't bother (or know) to point out the play on the word meter.
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